I am feeling generous and since cooking is something I enjoy doing, and can pull off without making anyone hurl, I thought that sharing my shitty recipes might be a nice addition to this shitty blog.

Don’t expect much thought. I sort of just make it up as I go along , but this one I made up only once and I make it a lot because it tastez so good:

Ingredients:

1 package of corn tortillas (if you use flour, don’t ever speak to me again)

For the shrimp marinade:

60-ish med raw shrimp (de-veined and peeled)

1/4 cup or so of extra virgin olive oil

4-5 dashes of tobasco

2-4 pinches of kosher salt

4 shakes of ground black pepper

the juice of 2 limes

4-5 shakes of ground cumin (pronounced KEW-min, not CUM-in, you sick pervert)

4-5 shakes of garlic powder

4 cloves of garlic crushed (not chopped)

about 1/4 cup of roughly chopped cilantro

1 serrano chili cut in 4 peices (don’t you DARE use jalapeno)

Directions:

mix all ingredients in a large zip-lock bag, shake the bag to mix it all up, and then add the shrimp. Squeeze all air out of the bag, give it a good old rub-down, and let the shrimp marinate in fridge for an hour or two…or you can be a total asshole and let it marinade longer, I don’t give a rats ass.

For the Tomatillo salsa with Avocado:

1/2 of a medium size white onion, finely chopped

2 large serrano chili’s, or 4 small (don’t be a lame ass and use jalapenos…  jalapenos are for pussies.)

4-6 tomatillos (make sure that they are vibrant green in color, not pale or yellow)

1/4 cup of cilantro, packed

3 cloves, or more, of garlic

2 ripe avocados, cut into small cubans cubes

kosher salt to taste

juice of 2-3 limes

Directions:

Wash and roughly chop the tomatillos, the garlic and the chilis. Put the chopped tomatillos, garlic, chilis, salt, and lime juice in the blender and pulse (on/off – on/ off) until it is pretty smooth in consistency. Sometimes, when I am really drunk, I will add a tablespoon of water to make it smoother. Next add the cilantro and pulse it a few times until its chopped up pretty well. Now add the avocado and pulse it just enough so that its blended in, you still want little chunks.. Lastly, pour it into a bowl and stir in the onion. Don’t ever put the onion in the blender, ever.

Taste it and add more salt to it if you want… at this point STFU, cover it with plastic wrap, and let it sit in the fridge while you grill the shrimp.

Grilling the tortillas:

Make sure that if you are using an indoor cast iron grill, that you get it super hot before grilling anything on it. Like you basically want it as close to smoking as possible so now would be a good time to disable your smoke detector.

I like to brush the grill and the tortillas with a mixture of olive oil and lime juice (whisked together), grill them on both sides until they get a bit crisp, and then keep them warm in the oven. You can heat up the tortillas however you want, heck microwave the damn things for all I care. Just do it first and stop complaining.

Grilling the shrimp:

I use a stove top cast iron grill, but you can use a  bbq, however, I suggest putting the shrimp onto skewers if you do decide to bbq them.

Just so you know, shrimp cook fast. Grill them until they get a little bit crispy on one side and then flip them only for about 30 seconds more. You don’t want raw shrimp but you don’t want overly cooked ones either, so get the grill hot enough and have a plate in the oven ready to keep them warm.

Once you have cooked all of the shrimp, you are now ready to assemble your tacos. If you need instructions on how to do this then you probably shouldn’t be anywhere near a kitchen, let alone a stove.

Here is a photo of what they sort of look like when done. Mind you, I made rice and beans on the side. I would give you the recipes for those as well but I am pretty sick of dealing with your crap.

Salsa:

Taco: