what a pity, it’s gone. again. i managed to find some of my old blog. what a total bummer.

March 2003:

“hi my name is colleen, i enjoy long walks in the park and being dicked around. if you are interested you can stalk me at home or follow me when drunk on a bus. after i have begged for you to leave me alone and you agree but continue to harass me ,i will do as i always do and wonder “why me” as I begin to plan the rest of my life around avoiding situations with you in them.

go away. fuck off and stop calling me. gracias. ”

March 2003:

“im feeling like i need to regurge some good gack and as i scrolled through my many irrelevant postings here i came across one that brought me great joy in writing… so like a song from the 70′s..

so in my confusion i have officially categorized cock. last night as i lay , unlaid in bed, i was thinking about all the shlongs ive met and it got me to thinking ….

1. the over eager cock: now this cock is a little ahead of its time, this is by far the worst..just when you think you are gonna get some…it ends before it begins and i just cant have me none of that. seek some medical attention. i dont care what you say, its called premature ejaculation and its sooo tired.

2. the average white cock: its white, its average…yawn. seen one of these…seen them all. never seen one? ah, ya aint missing much.

3. the leaning cock: this cock dont know which way its supposed to bend and if you arent prepared that shit can really freak you out..

4. the sneak up on you cock: this is your frends cock, yeah you know what im talking about.. that frend you let crash at your place cause you were both drunk.. the frend who knows you’ll never fuck him. not even wasted.. the one who cuddles with you in sleep and has his sick skinny pecker pressing up against your ass in the morning..ack. get a room..with yourself

5. The sensitive indie cock: this ones a real annoyance to say the least.. hey i like the music too, i can dig the scene (barely) and i also like vegetables…but this doesnt mean i want to fuck a piece of broccoli. enough with the emotional crap, grow testosterone already, your sperm are counting on you.

6. the western cock: this one thinks hes a cowboy riding you like a fucking bull.. um guys..save me some urinary discomfort, go back to texas.

7. the come twice cock: this one usually needs a blow job beforehand. he can get off and off and off and chances are you will be ready for sleep well before he realizes that you are no longer conscious and snoring like a bastard.

8. the im so drunk, eew i fucked YOU ? cock: pretty self explanatory. best if forgotten..quickly.

9. the punk rock cock: pierced cocks , mutilated cocks…all have a place..in someone ELSE, yikes..

10. the old man cheating on his wife cock: it smells like grandpa, but hey.. ya needed the money.

11. the professional athlete cock: nothing beats a dick as thin as a pencil and balls the size of marbles! go team! go steroids! ”

true classics. ….