shit became official.
love and snausage from Poland. xo
Category Archives: Pregnant Pause
Labor and Delivery
August 21, 2011
oh hai.. wow I would be 41 weeks today, two days ago hahaha I’ve been trying to write this for daaays!!!
What a weekend, week, experience…life. shoot, I just fell asleep typing… weird. Every time I breastfeed the baby, I fall asleep uncontrollably.
Anychappednip, as you know, MY BEAUTIFUL BABY GIRL WAS BORN! Can you believe it?! I am still trying to process it all because it happened so fast!!
So let’s get to it before my sweet pea wakes up.
Two days before my due date, which was August 12th , I started having some pretty intense “false labor” contractions at night. I bitched about these things keeping me up at night here. They were pretty regular but not really painful, mostly just crazy ass tightening in my abdomen with a bit of pressure, and they stopped as soon as I got out of bed in the morning. So basically, a big waste of my time.
On August 12th we had my 40 week appointment to assess all the shiz that needs assessing when you have hit the 40 week mark , (AFI, fetal well being, dilation, placental function), and everything was just fine. Despite having a mess load of contractions for two consecutive nights I was only dilated to 1cm and less than 50% effaced, pretty disappointing. My Dr. then told me to go into the hospital on Sunday for another CTG control and that controls would be done every two days until I delivered. Word.
I was certain that I would go into labor on Saturday night, full moon…
Anyway, on Friday night around 11 or so I went to the toilet and saw that I was bleeding a bit. Well, ok, not really bleeding in the sense that blood was gushing out of me, but more like a glob of lusciousness. Not huge but still pretty nasty-oh shush up. I was not sure what to make of it since a bit of bleeding is normal right after having a cervical exam, but I was sure that this was the start of something . So I went to bed and surprisingly, I slept really really well.
I woke up on Saturday the 13th around 9am, went to the bathroom and saw that I was still bleeding a bit. This time it wasn’t globby but more of a slow constant, but light, flow. Almost like a period. I wasn’t sure if this was normal because everything I had read said that bright red bleeding was abnormal no matter how far along you are so I decided to wait an hour or so to see if there were any changes and as I began to walk around I started having contractions that felt really “different” than anything I had felt before, more like menstrual cramps. I did not time them at this point, rather I kept myself busy by making cupcakes to take to the staff at the hospital and by trying hard to focus my energy on being “present” and to enjoy these last moments where she was still inside of me and still all mine. I feel really fortunate that I had that time to prepare a little mentally. You never know how much it hits you, “wow I am not pregnant anymore”, until you come home from the hospital to the house the same way you left it as a completely changed person with a big empty belly and the baby in your arms. It’s pretty crazy, you know, 10 months of anticipation, anxiety, excitement, planning, wondering “when and how” and thinking that the day will never come, and then finally, it’s time, it happens and then you are on your own and your head is spinning, and you can’t poop to save your life.
Alright so back to the story, I see Georgie bug starting to stir (this was yesterday, she has stirred 10,000 time since) and I’ve been trying to write this now for 600 days.. OK so around 3:30pm, I decided to phone the hospital about the bleeding. It hadn’t gotten worse, but it also hadn’t stopped and I wanted to be sure that it wasn’t coming from the placenta or anything. I wrote about it here. The midwife told me to come in and so I hopped in the shower and headed to the hospital thinking I’d be in and out. I get to the hospital around 4pm and get hooked up to the CTG. My contractions were intensifying but still pretty irregular. I was checked and still only at 1cm dilated and around 50% effaced. They were unsure of the source/cause of the bleeding and they wanted to keep me over night for observation until my Dr. could come in on Sunday and examine me. I was really upset about that. I wasn’t ready to be there. The CTG showed that the baby was fine and the sonogram ruled out the placenta being the cause of the bleeding so I did not see why I was being forced to stay when I live less than five minutes away from the hospital. Another thing that really sucked was that the woman who stuck the CTG receptors to my belly, did not have the one that picks up contractions on the right place, it kept slipping down, so the contractions I was having, were not being recorded and they couldn’t say for sure that I was in labor, which was the clearly reason for the blood, and send me home until things progressed or check me in to labor and delivery. So they put me into a room on the maternity floor. I had to go back down to labor and delivery at 8pm for a second CTG and at that time the contractions I were having were picked up by the CTG and the Dr. told me to head back down if they got worse later on, which they did, and by 11pm I was having contractions at least every 3-4 minutes. Flippin’ brutal dood. My husband had left to walk the dog and pick up some dinner and when he returned around 1am I was in the shower, keeled over, begging for mercy.
this was during my 2nd CTG at 8pm. The contractions were becoming a regular thing… and it shows.
One last glimpse from above… so long belly maximus.
By 1am it was no longer tolerable, the contractions were one on top of the other. I didn’t need to time them because I felt them more often than I didn’t feel them, so I told my husband to phone the nurse and tell her that we needed to go downstairs NOW… and downstairs we went. Once we arrived I was checked and was only 2cm dilated. After an entire day of contractions?!? UGH. I asked if I could get in the tub but they wanted to monitor me for a few minutes first so they hooked me up to the monitor to check on the baby and she was sleeping. The midwife then explained to me that until she woke up I would need to stay on the monitor… Meanwhile the contractions were 2 minutes apart and the last thing I wanted to be doing was lying down, it was hell. It hurt BAD. While we were waiting for miss G to wake up, the midwife came around and injected my IV with some homeopathic chamomile infusion which did nothing but I was desperate and willing to try anything. I really was going to try and stick it out as long as I could without medication but about after another hour of contractions were were 1-2 mins apart, I was only 5cm and still lying down… I honestly felt like I could not go on. I was shaking from the pain and I felt like I was going to puke and/or pass out every time a contraction hit. I remember thinking that this must be how it feels to be burned alive or having your toe nails ripped out. Absolute torture. I just cannot explain it.
At that point I was screaming at the top of my lungs and most likely scaring the shit out of the other patients and my poor husband who sat there with a look of horror on his face each time a contraction began. The midwife suggested that now might be a good time for the PDA (epidural) – yes THE MIDWIFE, IN HOMEOPATHICLAND GERMANY, suggested it- she was concerned with the width of my hips and my inability to relax which, she felt, would prolong labor and these contractions were one on top of the other, like a bat out of hell. Honestly, I wanted to try to go without the PDA, but I really did not have the proper support. Not to say that my husband wasn’t supportive, he just was not prepared and had no idea how to coach me through the pain. It is harder than it sounds. I think that had I hired a doula or spoke German so that the midwife, who spoke no English, could have understood me perhaps things would have gone differently but I was not strong enough on my own and I agreed to the PDA.
I suppose I had imagined that the midwife would step up and push for a natural delivery when the going got rough and I started to buckle, but when she actually suggested that I get the epidural, I surrendered to modern medicine and I don’t regret it really…
Sooo the PDA went in and the pain went away. It was a miracle. I could still feel and move my feet and legs which I wasn’t expecting and, to be honest, I am really glad I got it. I was able to conserve my energy, unclench my fists, and enjoy the experience and within 30 minutes, I dilated from 5cm to 10. Srrsly dood, like that. Fucking crazy. I felt no “pain” but the pressure came on full force. It was like wanting to lay the biggest log of your life and it was coming whether you assisted in pushing it out or not. Very intense. I actually didn’t even really push. I could feel my body doing the job on its own, like it was possessed, and six minutes after that urge to bear down struck, at 3:04am, Georgiana Leona made her entrance into this German world, quietly, and intimately with just my husband and the midwife present (the doctor didn’t even make it in time). I had no injuries, no tears, no stitches, no pain and very little bleeding. The delivery was as perfect. She was alert, cried a bit at first, quickly turned pink and scored a 10/10 on her APGARs. She took to the boobie right away and hasn’t left it alone for longer than two hours since. She is absolutely beautiful and we are so frickin happy!!!
Just so you know, I never had a “birth plan”. I didn’t want to have negative feelings about my experience or feel disappointed in myself for not enduring pain that, in this day and age, can be avoided rather safely if one chooses, if something didn’t go as planned.
The only real “plan” I made was to have a baby, a healthy baby… and I fucking nailed it. I did request that the cord not be cut immediately after birth and I was told that it is standard procedure to wait until it stops pulsating before it is cut, unless you are banking blood. I think my husband cut it about five – ten minutes after she was born.
and now, I’d like to take a moment to thank the anesthesiologist…
going home
Our baby has arrived!
August 14, 2011
She’s here and we are maxed out with love. Labor and delivery story to follow xo
Georgiana Leona
August 14, 2011 3:04am
3280 g (7 lb 4 oz) , 53 cm
Love love love love love and nothin’ but.
it’s a bloody mystery – (I am in labor)
August 13, 2011
Hi, I am writing from the hospital where I am being held captive for observation.
Before I begin, I must tell you that under no circumstance, not even if there’s a fire, are 1980′s cell phones permitted in this hospital, so don’t even try it:
I am not technically in labor and delivery, although these contractions are starting to come on stronger and more frequently so I wouldn’t be surprised if I get moved from my current room on down to L&D at some point tonight.
I am here because I was concerned about the bleeding I was having earlier. You see, I googled what normal early labor blood looks like (don’t do it, trust me) and that did not look like what I had going on so I called the hospital midwife who, of course, told me to come in (at least I THINK that’s what she said?!). My husband was MIA – apparently he went to wash the car in case I went into labor tonight and got a flat tire, total newb and his phone was at home, genius, so I hopped in a cab and headed on over, thinking I’d be quickly checked, told everything was fine, that I was PROGRESSING and then get released…. So they ran a CTG control and everything was peachy. The doctor came in and did an ultrasound and …ouch, major pain… said that everything looked fine and that the bleeding was coming from my cervix, but that she had no idea why. I was checked again, crotchally, and I was STILL only 1cm dilated, so damn discouraging, and hardly effaced at all.
They went to phone my Dr. who told them to keep me overnight until she could get in to see me the next day, tomorrow. This is when I completely lost it and I began to panic. Now I understand the concern, in fact, I share the concern, probably even more so, however, I was not bleeding profusely, I had had an internal exam the day prior, which can cause bleeding and I was/am having pretty regular, although really pathetic, contractions. So a little bit of blood, to me, did not seem like a huge enough deal to keep me here overnight, away from the comfort and security of my own home and/or bed. I didn’t even get to lick my dog goodbye!! Also, nobody spoke English when I got here. Not the doctor, not the midwife, not the nurse up on the floor. NOBODY. I really just felt like it was better for me if I go home. Heck, I live 5 minutes from the clinic, but no, they asked me to stay and that made me very unhappy.
So anyway, here I am. The contractions seems to be picking up but I seriously doubt that I will have this baby tonight. I am feeling a bit more at ease (meaning I no longer have the urge to RUN out of anything that opens to the outside) since both the Dr. and one of the nurses on the night shift speak perfectly good English. ouch fuck.
alright, I have to go. It is getting more difficult to type and the pain is all in my back and I think I might throw up.
Stay tuned .. IF YOU DARE.
here’s what could very well turn out to be one of the last pics of the belly.
40 weeks, 2 days (and two puffy eyes because I am a basket case):
and the full moon, from my hospital room window, that gives me hope:
sorry for any typos, run 0ns, extremely loud queefs… I am trying to keep my cool but the pain in my back with each contraction is almost unbearable and they are coming every 3-5 minutes.
how much longer til beer?
the countdown to vaginal annihilation…
August 13, 2011
After two sleepless nights of suffering through “false labor” I was finally able to get some really good deep sleep last night and then when I woke up I noticed that my belly is now sitting a good two inches lower than it was last night, meaning that the baby has dropped even further into my pelvis. And in addition to that, I am experiencing some pretty bad cramping – menstrual type cramps- and a bit of TMI bleeding. Not sure if this is left over irritation from yesterdays exam or if perhaps the homeopathic shit worked and I am actually going into labor.
I think this might be the real deal. A full moon extravaganza, such class.
Ladies and Gentlemen, I’ve just received an URGENT message:
What if she comes out wearing this fabulous coat? HAHAHA soooo fresh.
Time to make some cupcakes to bring with me to L&D and get out my VERY LAST pregnancy video! Pinch me!
Due Date
August 12, 2011
It is my due date today and it appears that angel face will be arriving fashionably late. Not surprised. Guess we just gotta go with it and let her call the shots this time. *humph* Fine.
To mark the occasion, we had a Dr. appointment. They did another routine CTG and everything came back beautifully. Baby looks like she’s having the time of her life in there, napping, kicking, being fed without having to chew or poop … basically free loading. That’s my girl!
The Dr. also did an ultrasound to check on the amniotic fluid level, placenta and blood flow. Fluids are great (AFI was about 11, which is fine), blood flow was great and she said my placenta was “very very nice” (yes TWO “verys”, don’t get mad) for being so far along. She took some measurements and everything was within a normal range. At this stage in pregnancy sonogram measurements/weight guesstimates are inaccurate so we didn’t read too much into the fact that today’s femur length measured less than it did at both my 34 and 37 week ultrasounds jajaja (bones can’t possibly shrink can they?!?). My guess, based on the discomfort in my ass, is that she will weigh between 6 and 7 pounds and that she will be 54cm in length. Oh, and the baby was sucking on her fingers during the ultrasound, you could see her little fingers bent and a thumb in her mouth, how ridiculously cute is that. 
I was also checked crotchally and was told that I am only 1cm dilated and 50% effaced. I am sort of incredibly bummed about this because I have been having pretty painful contractions at night, all night, for the past two nights. No sleep, only tears. The only real good news, aside from her being a perfectly healthy little mooch, is that her head is firmly engaged in my pelvis, so technically she has dropped. However, you’d never know this by looking at me or by actually being me. The bump still looks pretty high, my fundal height is still measuring at 40 weeks…and I still cannot fucking breath.
Aside from that, my blood pressure has returned to that of a normal living human being (113/60 as opposed to 90/50), and I put on 5 pounds in three weeks (ok, this kind of has me concerned). I also think I am starting to swell just a tad which may be the reason for the sudden increase in weight but I did see on my mutterpass that they found protein in my urine today; could they be related? They never mentioned it to me??
“Oh my God, look at that whale!!” (you look, I run)
Anyway, because I will officially be “late” as of tonight at midnight, I need to have CTG scans, and sonograms, done every two days from now on to monitor the baby’s well being so we will be heading over to the hospital on Sunday to get checked out again. I am hoping that I don’t make it to Sunday and that labor kicks in naturally, like TONIGHT. I really do not want to be induced and thankfully my Dr. is on the same page. She gave me some homeopathic stuff, (pulsatilla and caulophyllum?), which is supposed to increase the intensity of the contractions and wake my cervix up out of this coma. I am sort of scared to take it but sort of depressed about the thought of going through another 8 hours of regular painful contractions tonight and then making no progress, so I am going for it.
Anyway, I will get a video up tomorrow, assuming I am not in labor. I may even do it tonight if I am kept away again with these pesky bullshit false labor pains. Peace out sluts. xo
Below is the strip from this mornings CTG (or NST as they are called in the US). The upper row is baby’s heart rate and the little dots below mark fetal movement. You can see where she took a little snooze, ja ja ja, and the bottom is uterine activity. Can you see my two special friend fabulous contractions? Better than the flatline from two weeks ago, right?!
I am so flippin’ tired. Send me some good labor vibes peeps. xo
Forgot to mention: Doc said that baby is head down but in posterior position, meaning she is ” looking up at heaven” as she put it. Apparently this is not ideal for delivery. She should be facing my pooper not my abdomen ( I don’t blame her, but still). UGH. What do I do?! Gaaaah.
waiting is for LOZERZ
August 10, 2011
39 weeks, 5 days, a gazillion hours, a shit load of minutes and far too many seconds and donuts…
tonight is a great night for a Bowie marathon in L&D. whaddaya say? your daddy smells like burnt hair. please come quick! chop chop!
.. besides, you don’t want to be around all those full-moon assholes anyway?!? srrsly, so NOT original.
