yeppers it was a doozie. went to a chinese wedding…. ditched the cocktail hour with a few other friends who attended, picked up a bottle of vodker at the store, went to friends house and played rockband to kill time before the reception – a resourceful and tactful move, i might add. got through two super hard setlists (metallica- ugh) and then mozied on over to the reception . WELL…let me tell ya.. i was expecting dim sum… fried rice, sweet and sour anything… and what i was presented with had me spitting it out into my napkin. (sorry buddy, congrats to you..not the food). So i did what any good whore who ain’t diggin the food does and started doing double vodkas on the rocks..gotta fill the belly somehow…but then came the 2nd course, which i couldnt even chew without initiating the gag reflex (peking pork,peking duck…pekingese dog..) i dont know but whitey wasn’t havin none of it and the only way to get the taste out of my mouth was to literally slam 3 glasses of champers. so i did, and how, which lead to me getting very drunk and very loud about how horrible the food was… and THEN came the slideshow (they shoulda handed out sick bags prior to watching it-sorry again my friend) ….apparently there was a photo of the “happy about to be miserable” couple with some dogs in the park and i, being the classiest of broads, made a comment about how they probably wound up in tonights dinner. anyway,after ingesting two spoonfulls of soup, i couldnt take it anymore and i made a mad stumbling dash for the loo..hurl city sweetheart. i wretched, hurled and ralfed and then wretched some more – shark fin! peking dog!tongue of eel! paw of cat!suckingoff pig!…needless to say, not much came out, as not much was swallowed other than vodka and champerama. so my friend goes to get the car as i am in NO condition to walk, or be living at that point…he had quite a  laugh at my FULL recovery when he pulled up. one minute i’ve succumbed  to the porcelain god,  begging for mercy and the next minute im chumming it up with a group of chinese guys, laughing, chuckling-holding belly, slapping leg, smoking a ciggie like a pro…good times.

dont get me wrong, the wedding itself was lovely. my friend looked amazing and so did his wife. it is thier culture so im not trying to bash, im just stating my experience with the food. im sure to them, it was amazing and well thought out. mind you, 99.999 % of the attendees were chinese. i gave it an honest shot – my taste buds were just not designed to appreciate that sort of thing, er, flavour…but at least i tried it and whats so great, is that since i puked up most of the booze, i am SO not hung over today! yay! a bright side!